Whoever knows me knows I was in a car accident on 2010. By the grace of God, I survived that accident. I am now diagnosed as a quadriplegic. I get muscle spasms. I have sensation. I feel when I need to shift my body to prevent bed sore. I can move my toes on my right foot. I can move some fingers. I just can't move my legs freely, YET! Just recently, My God had showed my walking again. My God has showed me getting out of my powerchair and running around my church's Sanctuary! I did not ask for that. I ask Him to use me to show others how powerful He is.
I work my butt off twice a week at physical therapy. Yes, after 5 years I'm still in therapy. It has helped me gain the strength to transfer myself to and from the chair and going up and down hill. My strength has increased.
From being abled body to living with a physical disability SUCKS. I'm not going to sugar coat it. From being able to walk, run, go upstairs, jump into waves, the list goes on, to having to make sure you go places that is wheelchair accessible, making sure there are ramps, elevator, doors that are wide enough, SUCKS! Not have the sensation to use the restroom and having to worry about using a catheter and having to catheterization every 4 to 6 hours, SUCKS! I did not ask for this! However, life after the diagnosis is not the end of the world. Yes, I wish I can play softball again! Yes, I want to not have to think about having an bladder or bowel accident! Yes, I want to go through the clothing store and not run into clothing racks. Yes, I want my body to go back to how it used to be! But life with my physical disability has changed my views on what is normal.
I can live with my physical disability. I might have to keep more things on my mind. I might have some obstacles in my daily life, but I can still live an amazing life with my disability!
If you truly think about it, there are some perks to having a disability. My shoes never get dirty! They look new every time I put them on. In my power chair, i can go faster than someone walking! I get VIP parking everywhere I go. I don't have to wait in lines at any theme park. I don't have to wait in the women's restroom. I always get the big stall in the restroom. I always have a chair to sit in! I can make people move out of the handicap areas so the people who are with me can have a place to sit.
When you see me and your first thought is 'poor Christian,' shame on you! Pity is not what you should feel for me. I have never had pity on myself and I will not accept it from anyone else! I can't look at the things I can't do. If I dwell on those things, I will be depressed! I look at my life and say 'I'm alive! What can I do to make my life meaningful?' I personally have NEVER said WHY ME! I still have a purpose in this world. Life is more meaningful now than it was before my accident. I'm in school to become a teacher, which was the same dream I had before my accident. I volunteer at an elementary school. I tutor children who struggle with school. Helping others was always my goal in life.
My God has opened my eyes of what life really means and if I dwell on my disability, I will not have time to live my life to the fullest. God has given me peace and I want to share that peace with the world! Hopefully this reaches someone who needs to hear these things. May God bless you!
